... She woke up suddenly, as if from a shock ... listened ... this has happened more than once over the past few years - sudden awakenings with a feeling of incomprehensible anxiety and a wildly pounding heart. I didn’t like it, because this awakening was followed, as a rule, by a sleepless night in an empty and cold bed. But now everything was different - she was not alone, the warmth emanating from him was proof of that ...
It immediately became so calm, comfortable and even a little cheerful ... he slept very soundly, in that serene healthy sleep ... he had never been so close and she had the opportunity to freely see his features as far as the lighting allowed. She had not experienced such a surge of tenderness for a long time, how many times in her dreams she kissed his eyes, lips, arched eyebrows in surprise, and now she could hardly restrain the desire to touch him, so dear and close, and her thoughts were already "rewinding" the film of memory back. ..
He appeared in her field of vision not at the best period of her life ... Her world is such a cozy and warm house, her family served as an example for friends for many years - all this collapsed irreversibly ... Left by her husband for the sake of a young mistress, she is very I tried to hide from others the whole nightmare of what was happening and at the same time worked hard on myself. Like a caterpillar before turning into a butterfly, she weaved her cocoon, protecting herself, and what was left of the family from evil gossip and gossip, outwardly remaining prosperous and cheerful. All the uninitiated did not cease to be surprised at her changes ... And only God knew how much it cost her efforts.
He appeared in her husband's office so unsightly - overweight, tall and energetic, the employees immediately dubbed him "Computer". She noted to herself his attractiveness and some kind of chastity.
But the voice did not fit in with his appearance, so soft and enveloping that I wanted to forget everything and listen, listen ...
The task of the "Computer" included maintenance of machines and teaching dummies the basics of users. The teaching was difficult for her against the background of all the stresses that she had to experience daily at work when communicating with her husband, and in order not to deprive her of support at home, it was decided to install the messenger on her home computer, so that they could continue their studies every evening after work. Gradually, communication ceased to be only educational and they were already talking on various topics, sometimes even deep after midnight ... Without realizing it to herself, she was probably very afraid of loneliness, and these virtual conversations about everything and nothing kept her on afloat.
He once wrote that in his life there are two people dearest to him - his wife and daughter ... These words burned, sobered ... that evening she decided that she would get out on her own ...
It was difficult to delve into matters, everything was new and unfamiliar, the principles of thinking of a housewife with 12 years of experience did not fit into commerce in any way, but she was able, moreover, she was even able to return her husband. She did not take into account only one thing, that all this time, changing externally and internally, she completely destroyed her love for her husband, could not forgive betrayal ... What remained was what could only be called respect with an admixture of bitterness and sadness for the past time - that the time she was loved. So it is destined for her (she decided) to live without love and affection ...
Having changed her place of residence, having built her house - her little fortress anew, she was already beginning to calm down, but something was constantly drawn to where He was ...
Arriving on business trips, the first thing she called him (the temptation to hear his voice again was too great) was interested in his affairs, they sometimes met - but the communication was crumpled, she got lost, talked some nonsense, and then got angry at herself for it. This guy is hardly the only man who was still able to embarrass her. She was angry until she realized that she was simply in love with him head over heels.
On one of her visits, she learned with horror that he was in trouble ... family problems ...
He has changed a lot - he began to look into a glass, friends appeared corresponding to this addiction. She couldn’t come to terms with this ... Every day, inventing problems, she pulled him out to the office to eliminate all sorts of malfunctions, she saw that he didn’t want to go home, no one was waiting for her either - and they stayed up late in the office that hot summer.
Once he remarked to her that "only with her arrivals all sorts of miracles with computers begin" and apparently he taught her badly at one time to deal with them ... If only she could open up to him then ... She told him the truth only at the end of the summer for 10 minutes before the train leaves, by phone...
Then She did not know that for several months he had been seeking a transfer to the city where she lives - she lives without him. She didn’t know much at all ... And today she is next to him (there is a sharp smell of paint in his apartment) lying on the sofa that they bought together ... he asked for help in choosing furniture, and in the store he asked which sofa she likes .. .
***
She decided for herself that this would be the first and last time when she appeared in his dwelling - not yet filled with another life, which she had no right to encroach on, an empty dwelling with a small island of their ghostly happiness in the form of a sofa ...
***
He was visibly agitated, apparently felt that she had decided that evening to give up her principles for herself, he could see in her eyes how tired she was of fighting the feelings that had gripped her. His recent attempts to get close were met with "hostility" by her, but this was not from "unwillingness", but rather from surprise ... Too many things happened in a short period ... his move to her city, his confession of wanting to possess her . She was so used to yearning for him that she was confused when he was so close ... tonight was supposed to be a turning point in their relationship - she decided so and was very nervous ...
They walked down the dark street in silence, like conspirators. He held her hand, sometimes slightly squeezing her fingers, cold from excitement, and from these squeezing, her heart sank along with her breath and her legs gave way.
Contrary to all her expectations, he was a surprisingly inexperienced lover...
The beginning was stormy as soon as the front door closed behind them... as if afraid that one of them would change their minds... clothes flew in different directions, lining the way to the sofa...
The kisses did not caress - they burned, the movements were sharp and a little rough, but this did not offend, it was just somehow noted in the head that "not everything was as it was in dreams" ... he entered her abruptly - it was unexpected, but in a fit, she didn’t even immediately understand that he was too big for her and therefore she was experiencing some pain, but it was a pleasant pain, no matter how strange it sounded ... As expected, everything ended very quickly - the excitement of both was too great ... they lay silently pressed close to each other, but he was far away - she felt it ... what tormented him at that moment? I didn’t even want to think about it ... It turned out to be very simple - he was embarrassed that he also imagined everything was wrong ... and when she heard about it, she laughed out loud and, in his surprised look, told him the same thing ...
- Do you want to drink? - he asked. - however, it will have to be from the neck, I have no dishes at all ...
"She doesn't need it," she said. - You will drink from me.
- Like this? - he raised himself on his elbow and with curiosity began to observe her actions.
Having filled her mouth with mineral water, she tightly pressed her mouth to his lips, and then he understood what she wanted - he opened his lips and began to carefully drink the liquid given off, and along with water, her desire. It was so new to him that it turned him on faster than her mouth could empty. His hands, without undue haste, began to caress her body, lingering in those places where she was especially pleased, it itself prompted and directed his caresses to where they were expected ... But by the fact that he stubbornly bypassed some areas, she concluded that he is either not familiar with it or it does not turn him on ... and she decided on impudence.
- You know - she said - even though this is our first night with you, but I would like to know what you dreamed of doing with a woman in bed ...
- But I'm afraid that something may shock or offend you, as it happened with my wife.
- Don't worry about that, you don't know what I expect from this night...
- I would like to turn on the light and see you closer. There... May I?
While he got up to turn on the light, she lay down so that it would be convenient for him to carry out his plan, and since the light from the bare bulb blinded her eyes, she covered them with her hand. She really wanted to see his reaction, but she did not dare, because she was afraid to embarrass him ... and lay with her eyes closed, holding her breath and trying to at least somehow catch by ear what was happening with her researcher.
- Can I kiss you? - she heard after a while a voice hoarse with excitement.
“You can,” she replied, surprisingly just as hoarsely. My God, it flashed through my head, as a young woman I'm worried, well, wow ...
The breath was hot and intermittent, and the touch of the lips was light and timid, but the sensations experienced were exacerbated by the realization that she was the first woman he kissed like that, and were so strong that, moaning, she arched her whole body towards his caress - he grew bolder. Having brought himself and her to a complete frenzy, with some elusive gesture he turned her over on her stomach, raised her hips and entered her from behind, carefully, probably this time he felt resistance inside and realized that complete immersion was impossible and gave her the opportunity to regulate the depth of penetration. Feeling his hot hands on her hips, hearing his restrained moans, she completely lost her sense of the reality of what was happening, for some reason only one thing was spinning in her head "I'm melting like snow in his hot hands ..."
Tired of everything they had experienced, they lay on the blue sofa as if on a piece of the seventh heaven that they created for themselves ... he kissed her fingers, inventing affectionate words on the go - they both wanted this feeling of happiness and peace to have no end .. .
He fell asleep first, while she, listening to how his heartbeat calms down and breathing evens out, thought about what will change in her life now, because nothing just happens and doesn’t pass without a trace ... The time has come, it’s Her time to get out of the cocoon. ..