I was coming off of a semi abusive relationship and was kind of a mess. I kept fucking my ex because it was like fucking crack. The sex was good and I couldn’t shake him.
Luckily, I had good friends… some REALLY went above and beyond.
Once I ALMOST fucked my ex, but instead fled my house and ended up outside my dear friend’s apartment unannounced. His roommate let me in and I just kind of crawled into my friend’s bed.
“It’s a little late, friend,” he groaned as he woke up and wrapped his arms around me.
*We had made out a few times but nothing serious.*
“I thought I’d finally let you introduce me to Firefly. If it’s not too late, of course.”
“It’s never too late for the best show ever made… V, why are you in my bed?”
I sighed. “My ex came over and I was going to fuck him if I stayed so I decided to come here.”
“I don’t get you. He’s an ass.”
“I’m a sex addict with intimacy issues so I tend to recycle exes because they feel safe.”
That stopped him in his tracks. “You’re a sex addict? Like diagnosed?”
“Yep.”
“What does that look like?”
“Compulsive masturbation mostly. I get weird if I don’t orgasm every few hours. Thank god it’s never really manifested in infidelity, but occasionally I make bad decisions with people I’ve already slept with. It’s a compulsion like most things but it’s usually manageable.”
“How many times do you get off a day?”
“It depends on my stress level.”
He turned over and looked at the ceiling because I suspect he was hard. “Why can’t you just have casual hookups then? Why recycle exes?”
“Honestly? I like to be degraded in bed. The problem is that kind of sex requires a lot of trust. Not even just physically- which is hard in itself- but like, some men think they can treat me like dirt outside of bed.”
“That’s why you don’t hook up? Oh my god, you make so much more sense now. I couldn’t tell if you were just not into men because you reject people when we go out.”
“I assure you I’m into men. Too much sometimes. My ex is like heroine I can’t kick.”
“Can’t you just watch a lot of porn or something until you kick the habit?”
“I’m a sex addict, bro. Porn is not good for me.”
“Does it help to sleep here? I actually don’t mind if it will keep you away from him.”
“Really? To be honest, it’s a nice offer but… I don’t know.”
“Why?”
“Um… I’m not stupid and I’m afraid there might be a tiny spark here. I absolutely cannot start anything. I need to be single.”
“I’m older than you, V. I know what this is and I’m an adult who can handle it.”
“Also, I have to get myself off at night.”
He paused for a bit to consider this. “Could you do that here?”
“I don’t know… that feels intimate.”
“I’d probably get off too. I think I’d have to. I’m only human.”
“That feels more intimate.”
“Ok,” he conceded. “What if we just made a rule to only make out occasionally and mutually pleasure ourselves, but we won’t touch each other outside those parameters… apart from cuddling a little when you stay over.”
“I’m afraid you’ll catch feelings. Or I will.”
“We might… but that’s adulthood, honestly. You risk that with any relationship.”
“Ok…”
“Can I watch you do it?”
“Yeah… it’ll be fast. I haven’t gotten off all day.”
I slipped off my sweatpants, closed my eyes, and stuck a finger inside of myself to get wet. I moved my fingers in a circle then around my clit until I could feel myself building. I arched my back to take it and whimpered slightly.
I looked over and he was indeed getting himself off. He had pulled down his boxers and was stroking himself as he watched me.
*Yes, this was fucking weird. Young V often found herself in strange arrangements.*
I think I came in 60 seconds flat and climaxed fully with a gasp. I watched him really jerk it then and finally grabbed a tissue to come.
It was surprisingly not awkward. He shrugged it off, cleaned up in the bathroom, and then we cuddled all night.
We did that every night for a week. Sometimes he’d wake up to me getting off and join and other times he’d just lie beside me and then cuddle me after.
It was weird but it did get me away from my ex. It was an unconventional way to use each other, but I genuinely respected this dude and might have even dated him if our paths aligned in a different state.
You can probably guess this arrangement wasn’t permanent.
We broke one night when he was asking me about my past sex life.
“I don’t know… it’s weird. I got into BDSM for a while and I’m just generally into some level of pain when I’m fucking.”
“Like… what?”
“Spanking, choking, wax, toys. I don’t know… God, I miss being spanked.”
He got very still then and I knew what was going to happen before it happened. “Do you want me to spank you?”
So yeah…
I got on all fours on his bed and he got behind me. “I’ve never done this before,” he admitted.
“Start slow and work your way up. Like, get more intense each time.”
“Open palm?”
“Yeah…”
He very, very slowly reared his hand back and gently came down on me. I almost laughed it was so gentle and nodded for him to continue. He built up slowly, but it finally started to sting. I grabbed the sheets to hold steady.
“Do I need to stop?”
“No,” I said through gritted teeth. “You can go harder.”
He went so hard I yelped a little and moaned, begging him to keep going.
“Are you sure?”
“Please, I’m so wet.”
He pushed himself back and immediately pulled his pants down. “I’m sorry I’m so turned on…”
I flipped on my back and started touching myself alongside him. We made eye contact briefly as we both came and then something awkward settled between us.
“We have to stop,” I finally said.
“I know. You can still stay here if you need.”
“Nah, I think that has to stop too. It’s time for me to face this.”
He nodded his head. “I know. I’ll just miss you.”
“I’ll come over tomorrow to watch Firefly.”
*Great show btw.*
We stayed friends. The dude in this story actually gets along really well with my husband. He got drunk and my wedding and told me he had a man crush.
Sincerely, this is bizarre, but he’s actually an incredible friend and I think this story is a testament to that.